Saturday, April 10, 2010

Hey Choo,don't make it bad

Went to Starplus for badminton with my darlings this morning.
I miss Starplus! X)
It's been a long time I hadn't touch my racket.
My body was all wet,I was satisfied. :)
Decided to go for a jog next morning,hopefully tomorrow will be a sunny day,unlike this greyish morning.
The result of my painting for the art exam 2 weeks ago is finally 'baked'.
I get 70 out of 100,hahah,PASS!
But it doesn't effect anything bcuz I have to stick to my level until I sit for the SPM.
I wanna be the first student who make it to the top level in my center.
I wanna break the record.^^
Finally,I get myself a pair of new school shoes as my previous 'twos' were spoiled and have HOLES!
You can see my socks when I lift my leg up. XD
Whenever it rains,my whole shoe will be drowned in flash floods.
Was kinda emo just now.
I am now having 2 new tuition classes for another 2 subjects which are History and Add maths at Cekap.
It's on Sunday at 3pm for Add maths and Wednesday at 6.20pm for History.
I cried in the center just now.
I feel scared and worried.
That was my first time entering Cekap which is a totally new environment for me.
Mum will have to come back earlier every Wednesday to solve the transport problem.
My Sunday isn't going to be happy anymore.
I am having different extra classes everyday. :(
Whenever I think of SPM,my tears will start flowing down and my heart will start to worry.
My mind couldn't stop thinking and thinking until I couldn't have good naps.
I couldn't!
I wanna take some rest after the stupid exam but there're many many things waiting for my to complete!
I haven't even touch any of my homework until now.
How am I going to cope with them since I am so not a hardworking and undetermined person??
I always tell myself that I can do it for sure,be tough and have faith.
No...They doens't work for me anymore...
I need somebody to talk to,but I have no one.
I wanna talk to him,but he's busy outside.
I wanna talk to her,but she wanna spend time with her dad as he will be going back to China tomorrow.
What to do?
My stomach,again is a problem.
I was controlling my tears very hard so that anyone will not see them.
Suddenly,I realised that I am not a tough girl at all.
I am a girl who always rely on people.
It's too much Steph,too much.
Exam's on 19th May,exam again,again!!
I wanna swim,so I can cry as much as I want without anybody's knowing.
I think I might be thinking to much.
I need more time.
I need fresh air.
I need to complete my homework by tomorrow.
And start attending Add maths class tomorrow.
Many people are doing to same thing which I am going to do soon.
I need to get myself calmed,play less,think positive,and start living a 'proper' form 5 life.
He's going to college soon in May,I feel... :(
Ahhh...I feel so good with tears on my cheeks.
I am still me,the same me,the one who loves to laugh and being crazy.
Just be tough girl,everyone is same like me,you are not alone and there's nothing to be scared,right?
Bloggie,my dustbin,feel so good after throwing everything into your big stomach.
Let's finish the 2 essays and the clothes designs tonight.
Oh,it's a long blog writing today.
Kay,see ya.

xoxo smile

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